


Ascension To Pergatory

by sasukewasameme



Series: Ascension From Hell Series [2]
Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Depressed Eren Yeager, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hurt Eren Yeager, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Past Rape/Non-con, Rape, Rape Aftermath, Rape Recovery, Rape/Non-con Elements, Self-Harm, Suicidal Eren Yeager, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide Attempt
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-02
Updated: 2021-02-02
Packaged: 2021-03-14 03:20:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,149
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29164092
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sasukewasameme/pseuds/sasukewasameme
Summary: Eren wakes up to find he survived his suicide attempt and finds a Levi who is determined to help him get better. Will Eren ascend from his hell on Earth to a better place and will he ever recover?The Sequel To "Hell On Earth." Unfortunately, you won't be able to understand what's going on if you don't read the first book. Thanks for your time.
Relationships: Levi & Eren Yeager
Series: Ascension From Hell Series [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2140833
Comments: 5
Kudos: 44





	1. Chapter 1

Eren wakes up in a comfortable bed. He's too hypnotized by the comfort to remember what happened last. When he finally wakes up enough to start to remember, he rolls onto his stomach and cries into his pillow. He can't believe he's still alive. The universe really likes to watch him suffer. 

Eren only notices the other presence in the room when he feels as if someone is watching him. He wipes his tears and turns around. There stands Captain Levi in front of the door, sipping coffee. He fills with fear when he realizes that this overly clean place must be the Captain's very own room. 

He gets up, terrified of what kind of punishment might be in store for him after sleeping and crying on Levi's bed, and gets up and falls to his knees in front of Levi. He bows his head to show complete vulnerability and submissiveness. "I'm so sorry for sleeping in your bed. Please forgive me."

Levi stops midway when taking a sip. Then, he sets his coffee down on a table in the corner of his room before turning back to Eren. "Relax," he says. This makes Eren even more anxious, though, because he can't relax and so what's going to happen when he doesn't relax and breaks his Captain's orders? 

Levi raises his hand and Eren quickly throws his arms over his head to protect it and bows down the lowest his torso will let him. "I'm sorry!" He exclaims. Levi hesitates before warmly setting his hand on Eren's head. Eren flinches, expecting it to be a slap and expecting it to hurt. But, instead, Levi's hand rests on his head gently yet strong. 

He looks up to see the Captain's expression, attempting to determine his intentions by reading his face. There is zero animosity in his expression so Eren looks further: there is calmness, instead. But there is no fondness in Levi's face either. 

Eren admittedly feels a great disappointment at the fact that there isn't any fondness in Levi's expression. Levi is one of the last two people who openly don't hurt him in any way. He wishes he was important to Levi in some way. Like how a mentor especially cares for his student. 

He wishes the man would care about him but, instead, Levi looks at him the same way he looks at all of his other Squad members. Eren wishes there was someone who especially cared about him. Someone who would be heartbroken if he died. 

Eren dreams of a day where someone would truly care if he died. 

Suddenly, the screaming and crying of his Squad fills his ears as he remembers their pained cries when he hung himself. He doesn't understand why they cried when they have a hate for him. He shakes the thoughts out of his head for now. 

Eren redirects his attention to Levi and asks the one question he currently cares about. "Why am I still alive?" He doesn't mean to sound so disappointed when he asks that but he can't hide how upset he is to be back in the same place all over again.

"When you jumped, the rope lost its position so when you hanged, it didn't break your neck. Instead, you were left hanging there and suffocating to death." Eren wonders why he passed out when he hanged. He can only assume it's from dissociation.

But now Eren worries about how Erwin will react to his survival. By his laughter when he hung himself, it seemed he wanted him dead. So is he upset that Eren is still alive? He's not sure he wants to find out. "What am I doing here?" "I took you to my room which happens to be the safest place for you at the moment."

"What do you mean by that? Is Erwin after me?" Levi's face is serious. "No. He doesn't want to kill you but he does want to hurt you. Hange said she thought you needed rest to help heal your body. You were so injured that if Erwin made one mistake while hurting you, you would've died, hence why we hid you in here."

Eren nods. But just as one question is answered, another one has to come up to replace it. "Why are you protecting me?" He doesn't want to sound vain in this question, by implying he's somehow important but he wants to know. It seems like everyone hates him and not only that but Erwin could fire Levi and Hange so why are they doing this?

Levi shrugs. "It felt right." Eren is somewhat surprised by this answer. After all, Levi's always the one saying his morals are completely fucked so why does him getting beat and raped feel wrong but using violence to get answers from enemies does not?

Levi sees the question on Eren's face but doesn't bother to answer unless he asks. To him, there's a difference between using violence against people who did messed up things and are trying to end humanity and using violence on someone innocent like Eren. Eren hasn't done anything wrong yet he's still being beat. And rape is wrong regardless of what bad things a person has done. Levi would want to save anyone from such a date as rape.

Levi watches as his broken squadman rises to his feet. He can see the distress on Eren's face and even though Levi thinks it's right to save someone from abuse, he doesn't know it's right to save them from ending it all when their life is miserable and likely won't get better.

But Levi will try. He and Hange will try to end this abuse. After that, it's up to Eren as to whether he'll rebuild himself or stay broken but at least Levi will have done his part. Hange's plan is easy, actually. Levi will fight Erwin until he promises to leave Eren alone and if he refuses, he'll have no choice but to kill him. 

He'll have to kill him because the court has already decided he won't go to prison, meaning he'll never get punished and therefore will never stop the abuse until he's dead. Levi thinks it won't end pretty. After all, Erwin is a stubborn man. He can't believe he never saw how cruel Erwin was behind the man's facade.

He thought he knew everything about him but he was completely wrong. Levi closes his eyes from the stress. But he'll make up for it. 

He let Eren out when it was time for training. When they get to the field, Erwin doesn't seem surprised to see Eren coming from the house with him. But there's an unsettling fire in his eyes that tells Levi he's not going to let it go unpunished. Perfect. Everything is going as planned. 

Eren sees the fury in Erwin's eyes when he goes to training with Levi and knows he'll be punished greatly later. He's not sure of Erwin's intentions anymore because of his earlier reaction to him hanging himself. For all he knows, Erwin actually wants him dead. Eren cowers at the thought that his later punishment might be Erwin beating him to death.

He wishes he hung himself right.

When training is over and Eren is collapsed on the ground beyond exhausted, he uses what energy he has left to go meet up with Erwin in his office. He prepares himself for the severe amount of pain waiting for him but when he gets there, Erwin's expression is warm and... fond?

Erwin has Eren sit on his lap and he pets him gently before leaving kisses all over him when they get undressed. He touches Eren in a very strange way. Is this what is considered to be loving? He goes slow and pays much attention to foreplay. He makes sure he feels good which makes him confused. 

Eren is feeling good. Too good. Is this what sex is supposed to feel like? He's never thought of himself as gay but with the way his body reacts to these touches and the way his heart confusedly flutters, he wonders if he isn't heterosexual. His mind yells at him. This man has hurt him more times than he could count. Why is he feeling this way all of a sudden?

He lets Erwin's hands touch him openly, taking a risk. He feels as if he can trust that Erwin won't hurt him right now. He sees it in his eyes. Then, Erwin moves on to the actual sex itself, which happens to be not painful and just as gentle as every other touch. 

When Erwin thrusts forward, he's clearly focusing on Eren's pleasure rather than his own. Has Eren ever seen this man so selfless before? Even before all of the abuse, Erwin was a very selfish man, willing to risk thousands of men and woman for the sake of seeing Eren's cellar. 

But here he is, handling Eren in any way but selfish. Eren feels his feelings drop from ecstasy to fear as he wonders what Erwin gets out of this. Out of being nice to him today. Does he think Eren will trust him from now on just because he was kind to him once? 

Yes, Eren is trusting Erwin in the moment but trust in the moment is different than everlasting trust. Erwin hits his prostate again and again and Eren is loud. His body shakes as it reaches orgasm and when he feels himself cum, it hits him harder than he thought and he cries out, tears coming to his eyes as his body tremors and he has the best orgasm of his life. It feels so good, he can hardly take it. 

When he comes down from his high, Erwin holds him against himself and they stay there for about twenty minutes until Eren gets up, needing to get ready for more training. The silence is awkward for Eren as he doesn't know what to say after that. He doesn't want to tell his abuser it felt good but he's still feeling good from the orgasm and he wants to say something. 

Finally, he leaves before he lets himself embarass himself and goes out to train. 

When training is over, Levi eats his dinner and then he escorts Eren back to his room when dinner is over. Eren asks him where he's going when he leaves. "To take care of something," he answers. He leaves to wait outside so he can watch as the guards around Erwin's office slow down until there's only two left. He takes his ODM gear in case he needs to escape anything. 

He also brings a long, sharp knife in case he needs to kill Erwin. (Which he most likely will.) He should be able to take the two guards down quickly and (mostly) quietly if either of them decide to interfere. He's only directly attempted to kill people when they were after him and his squad. These matters are different.

He usually wouldn't do this but there's more reason to do it than not to do it, including that they need to get rid of Eren's stress so he can use his Titan abilities again and therefore save humanity. Levi approaches the guards and they let him through, thinking his intentions are just to talk. 

When he opens the door, he finds Erwin sitting at his desk with his legs crossed, waiting for him.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh, wow. Already, quite a few of you are starting to read this. I appreciate it. I check literally all of my readers' profiles when they give kudos or leave a public bookmark to see if they've written anything and when I've already clicked on a profile, the profile turns grey instead of white. All of the profiles who've left kudos so far are grey, meaning it's all people who's profiles I've already checked which means it's all people who've left kudos or bookmarks previously on other ff (probably on Hell On Earth.) So, thanks for continuing to read my stuff, guys!!!

"So, you've come," Erwin says. Levi walks forward, enraged yet depressed. He closes the door behind him and takes out the knife he brought before running at Erwin. Erwin, who was also a brilliant soldier before he was a leader, dodges Levi's knife swiping through the air and jumps into his desk. 

Levi wonders why he didn't bring his own ODM gear. He thinks about this throughout the fight. Erwin dodges again and again and as he gets tired, he moves slower. An advantage of having ODM gear is that ODM gear aren't living things that can get tired and so it runs just as fast and smooth as it was running before. 

Levi doesn't get tired. He doesn't let himself. If he doesn't win this fight, he'll either spend a good part of the rest of his life in prison and he'll have to live with the fact that Eren would be abused until he dies or (if Erwin doesn't get him in prison) he'll have to spend every day of the rest of his life pretending the abuse isn't happening and Eren will be abused until he dies.

Either way, it doesn't end well for Eren (or himself for that matter) if he loses this fight. Levi jumps into Erwin's desk and thinks he has the perfect angle. Erwin is standing across from him, watching his movements. Then, he strikes. He jumps at Erwin as fast as he can and he watches the man's expression go from calculated to worried. 

He dodged just in time. To anyone else, this may seem like Erwin's win. But this was, in fact, his loss. He moved too slowly when dodging, showing his enemy his weakness: speed. Or lack thereof. Sure, he was getting slower before but he's gotten drastically slower since then and if he'd covered up that fact by using the last bits of speed he had, Levi wouldn't have known how much slower he'd gotten.

Levi has been in many fights in his life and over the years, he's learned that at some point during fights, you get good enough to realize when you're going to win a fight. Sometimes, you know when you'll win the second you start the fight and other times you know just before you win. But there's always a moment in which you realize whether it's your victory or not.

And for Levi, that moment is right now. Unlike other fights, however, this moment is dramatic. He sees that to win the fight, he only needs to take all of his energy and go slightly faster the next time he jumps at Erwin with knife in hand. 

When he sees what he needs to do, he feels the world slowing down around him and suddenly, he can hear every noise and can see the smallest of details. And for some reason, he feels shocked. Maybe because the answer was right there in front of him and he only just realized it.

And then he knows: he's going to win. 

Levi's foot touches the wall across the room from Erwin's desk and he sees exactly where he needs to aim to injure his enemy. It's almost like a map showing him exactly the point of entry he needs to make to injure Erwin too much for him to be able to do anything. Levi bends his knees against the wall for only a second before springing up from the wall towards the man who was once his best friend.

Thoughts so quick that they almost don't exist pass through his head. He thinks about how crazy it is that he's killing his old best friends. Months ago, he wouldn't have believed it if you told him this was going to happen and may even beat you around a bit for saying so.

But here he is, flying at Erwin Smith with every intent to injure him beyond the point of turning back. Eren's broken face fills his mind and his disbelief over the whole situation turns back to rage. This man is evil. This man deserves to die. 

Erwin turns his head just in time to be hit with the knife. His face looks terrified. The knife stabs him in his left leg but Levi isn't done yet. He holds Erwin down with his own weight and stabs the man in his other leg. His "victim" yells out in pain and anger. Then, for extra measure, he breaks each of his legs which causes more loud yells of pain. 

Levi wonders why the two guards haven't come in yet to save their cruel leader. But that doesn't matter until they actually come in. He stands up and kicks Erwin across the face. "Leave Eren alone." Then, Erwin laughs, the bastard. Levi kicks him across the other side of his face, harder this time. 

"If you never hurt Eren again, I'll stop hurting you." The tall man looks into his eyes and smiles wide and condescending. "I didn't hurt him. He liked it. Do you -" He doesn't want to hear anymore. He punches his front teeth and knocks them out. "Your tongue is next if you don't agree to leave Eren alone."

But the blonde only laughs. Then, he gets up on his legs bent the other way and crab walks on them towards the door. He looks inhuman and disturbing. But then Levi realizes that he's not walking to the door. Erwin reaches up to a box on the bookshelf near the door. 

He opens it and Levi is at his feet, landing on his abdomen. The next time Levi looks up, he's staring down the barrel of a gun. He moves to kick the gun out of Erwin's hand but Erwin puts his finger on the trigger in warning. Levi hadn't expected this. "Put the knife down." 

And Levi knows in that moment. He knows that he has to choose. He has to choose whether he'll take the chance of getting shot by trying to stab Erwin or if he'll drop the knife and most likely live to see another day. He thinks it'll be hard to decide but when he thinks about the eternal guilt he'll feel if Erwin continues abusing Eren, he quickly decides that there's no other choice but to risk his life.

Inside his head, he apologizes to Hange and he acknowledges the fact that he'll see Isabel and Farlan again if he dies doing this. And that thought gives him all the courage he needs to bring his knife down on Erwin. Levi hears the sound of a gunshot and feels a seering pain on the top of his head. 

He figures that most people would drop at the pain if they were in hsi situation but he refuses to die for nothing and the pain only makes him push the knife into the air harder until it connects with Erwin's chest and breaks bone to dig itself into his lungs and he hears the evil blonde man, Erwin, wheezing. 

Erwin looks like he's trying to stay something but as he takes in another breath, he chokes on blood filling his lungs. Levi looks at the knife that's still in his hand and does the final act which would lead to Erwin Smith's forever death. He pulls the knife out and lets Erwin's lungs completely full with blood. 

Levi believes in justice but he is no sadist so he doesn't stick around to watch Erwin choke to death. When he leaves the room, he finds the two guards looking at home with fearful eyes. Oh. He realizes why they didn't stop him. They didn't stop him because they thought it was impossible to defeat Levi. 

And so, Instead of doing their job, they stood there in fear, hoping they weren't next. Levi stops looking at them and steps forward. He's moving forward in life. Whatever happens to him after this happens and he's going to deal with it. But where he feels the soul aching feeling he gets whenever he kills a human, he also feels good. Like he's done something right. 

He hopes this is enough for Eren to move forward in life. He goes to his room, where Eren sleeps, and sleeps on the floor only after taking a shower and changing clothes. 

~~~~~~

Eren wakes up the next day feeling the same as every other day. He wants to split his skin open until he sees the fatty muscle hiding beneath the layers of his skin. He notices something move in the corner of his eye and is startled to find Captain Levi standing there.

Levi looks down. As if something bad had happened. Eren wants him to just tell him what happened before he starts worrying and coming up with paranoid reasons as to why Levi is upset. "What happened?" Asks Eren, and he has to remind himself that Levi won't hit him for asking. 

"Erwin is dead." He says it in a sturdy voice. Like he's already accepted it. Eren is relieved. Then he feels guilty for being relieved. Then he's relieved. Then guilty over being relieved again. The more he thinks about it, the more relieved he is. He doesn't know why he feels guilty over being relieved about his abuser's death. 

But he figures it might be because the last time he had sex with him, he was gentle. Maybe Erwin was changing. Maybe there was a chance they could've lived happily together. And that's when Eren realizes it: he loved him. 

Then, Eren wants to cry because he's so damn broken. He knows it's fucked up that he loved him. And the worst part is he doesn't know if he actually loved him or if he's just convinced he did because of how messed up he is. 

And, finally, Eren cries. He cries from relief that it's over, from agony that it ever happened, and from heartbreak because he'll never see the man who told him he live him again. Because even though Erwin abused him, at least he loved him. He was the only one who did. When everyone else hated Eren, Erwin was there. 

Levi watches his squadman break down in front of him and he starts to question whether killing Erwin made things worse or not. He doesn't regret killing Erwin and he won't but he just hopes Eren has the smoothest recovery he possibly can. 

"Who killed him?" Levi didn't expect Eren to figure out it was murder this soon but he supposes it makes sense considering Erwin was a healthy man with goals in life. It wouldn't be a suicide and it wasn't likely to be an accidental death either.

Levi sighs and sips his coffee. "You'll find out sooner or later." 

~~~~~~

When the news comes out that Erwin died, Armin, Jean, Connie, Sasha, and Historia all immediately fill with both relief and guilt, similarly to Eren but for complete different reasons. They were informed that Eren is still alive last night. They feel relief because that means they don't have to be awful to Eren anymore but even more, they feel guilt because they were awful in the first place. 

They don't expect Eren to forgive then whatsoever but they want him to know that they never truly hated him. Armin full-on breaks down. He doesn't deserve Eren, he thinks. He's such an awful friend. "Hey," says Jean. "We were all terrible to him. Not just you. What matters now is that Eren knows we care."

Mikasa, who just woke up, cries from the relief she feels after hearing about Erwin's death. Hange has to stop her from finding Eren because her wounds aren't completely healed yet. "They're mostly healed," she argues but Hange won't have it. "You could accidentally open them and then you'd have to start the healing process all over again."

Hange is the only one who is fully happy in the whole situation about Erwin's death. She firmly believes Eren will recover, even if it is a long process, and she hated Erwin the second she found out the truth about everything. She can't find it in herself to be sad over his death. 

All Hange is worried about now is the fact that there's almost no doubt that the Court knows who killed Erwin. Levi didn't take care of the two guards that were there that night and there's such a high chance that they snitched that she wouldn't even consider any other possibilities.

~~~~~~

Two days pass and no one visits Eren due to not knowing where he is. Both Hange and Levi decided that Eren needs to sort out his feelings as best as he can before seeing his friends. They're scared that him realizing his friends still care about him will emotionally push him over the edge and they don't want that.

At approximately 12 PM, Levi is summoned to talk to some officers about the night Erwin died. He can only hope he won't get the death penalty. He tells them the whole truth, not one to cover his own ass. The only thing he refuses to tell them is where Eren's at and he doesn't tell them about Hange's involvement, small as it was.

Ar 3 PM, he's shackled and put in a cell. 

~~~~~~

3 more days pass and it's finally time for Levi to go to court so a judge can decide his fate.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really hope you guys like that I had Levi kill Erwin. At least one person suggested it in "Hell On Earth" and I thought that that would be a wonderful way to end Erwin's abuse. Keep in mind that this story is the Pergatory level of life Eren has to deal with, meaning it's going to be a mix of good and bad. The true happy ending will be in the third book which will be titled something to do with Heaven, where Eren is healed and happy. Just a couple reminders.
> 
> Thanks for reading!


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